The Past Never Has To Run The Future

Something really came up for me today while I was diving into my journal and it kind of surprised me, but also kind of not.

I think that I just decided to admit it to myself and am also ready to move on from it. As soon as I wrote it, I was like…oh shit, I know that I have tor write about this.

And if I’m behind honest, which I always am, it’s a pretty vulnerable thing for me to share because it shows just how imperfect I am.

I think that in this coaching and online industry where we’re expected (or maybe we put on these expectations ourselves) to show up perfectly or like we have it all together all of the time, it feels like we’re being exposed when we share the real shit that’s meant to come out.

It feels like this fear comes up of, ‘omg are people then going to not want to work with me because I still have shit that I’m working on?’!

I think that’s a really common fear for all of us.

But what I’ve found again and again, even though this fear can come up every once in a while for me, is that it’s always when we are HONEST that people feel like they can truly see us.

When people truly see us, they feel connected, and they know that we’ll be able to truly see them.

It’s a two way street. You can’t see something in someone else that you’re unable to see in yourself.

So, shall I just cut to the chase and actually share that vulnerable thing already?

As I was writing, I realized that I’ve been kind of over thinking some tasks like sending emails, writing posts, and recording trainings for courses.

I have a list I’m working through just to make sure that I remember everything because right now I’ve got three different courses I’m working on creating content for and a new sequence we’re building as well.

And it’s like…uhhh hello what are you avoiding Ariel?

So when I got deeper into it what I realized is that there were little old things coming up about feeling like maybe I’d be misunderstood by behind more successful or maybe other peoples limiting ideas would get into my head and then I would revert back to old ways after being successful…and crash and burn.

But that still didn’t feel like it was quite it. Mostly because I was able to look at those things and immediately go — well that’s BS and I know that I have control over my own thoughts, so no. Bye satan, thanks but no thanks for the fear. I won’t have it.

Then it hit me. The reason that I’m afraid of crashing and burning again is because I’m afraid of a.) how easy success can actually be at higher and higher levels. I’ve seen it, I’ve been there, I am there and I know that it only gets easier. B.) That if I were to crash and burn or get near that, I have been carrying around this deep fear that I’ll have to trigger on my own stress response to rectify that.

So if you’re going — uh, wait Ariel, aren’t you super successful?! Well, yes. But there was a time AFTER I got super successful the first time where I lost all trust in myself, totally stopped listening to my intuition and therefore my business tanked. It wasn’t horrible. I was still making money, but I wasn’t making as much as I had been making, I wasn’t managing my money well (which is a product of low self worth), and I was doing things that didn’t produce any sales at all!!

The creditors were calling and I honestly considered going bankrupt with all of the loans in default that I had. I had taken out a ton of loans to invest in my business, which again was a product of the lack of trust in myself.

To be clear, loans aren’t bad in any way, but what I was taking them out for wasn’t aligned so it was becoming difficult for me to get a return on the investment that I had made — since what I was learning wasn’t what I really wanted to be doing anyway.

Ok, back to the thing. The main thing that this entire post is about. Thinking that I would have to go into total freak out and stress response mode with each next level of success, desire, where I’m going.

I mean, this is what happened before, so why wouldn’t it happen again?!

Well because that’s not who I am any more. We always get to choose.

There are countless things or reasons why it doesn’t have to be true.

But I think the main message for you in me sharing this, which is the whole point of writing this moderately disjointed blog posts, is that what happened in the past doesn’t have to be carried into the future unless you choose it.

Even if something did happen that was less than desirable, I bet there was a lesson in it! There always is.

I bet that you realized what you would do differently next time. I bet that you’ve already decided that you will never do that again.

It’s the releasing the shame, the deciding that it was ok to learn, even good to learn and choosing that this is just part of life - not good or bad - that can help you let go and move into your next evolution of person, of success, and of impact.

We can’t evolve into that person who has the things that we want to have or is impacting in the way that we want to if we are stuck in feeling like we did all the things wrong from the past. Yass??!! Can we agree?!

Obviously we can, otherwise you wouldn’t still be reading.

Most importantly it’s the continuous act of choosing what you are going to believe and know is true for you moving forward. It’s deciding what you are available for and what you are going to let go of now. It’s committing to that every single day without going back into the old pattern and if it comes back up, telling it to take a hike.

It’s that. It’s being relentless no matter how hard it feels.

At the end of the day it’s only your experience, it’s only your life, it’s only your life’s work. It’ll all be fine and good and ok. But you can choose to make it great and bright and lit up and joyful and something that touches millions of lives. Something that YOU as the high achieving, never really have made it yet feeling, visionary person you are, really wants to live.

You can choose that. You can have it all.

Don’t ever let anyone (or your own damn brain) tell you otherwise.

xo Ariel

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Ariel Frey is an intuitive messenger, business mentor and visionary entrepreneur building an empire. She helps you create success from your soul and truly live free. Ariel is the host of the Babies, Biz, Beautiful Life Podcast! It’s packed with divine messages, practical wisdom from a self made multiple 6 figure business owner, and is everything about how to live your most beautiful life. Listen and subscribe here!

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I’m Ariel Frey, intuitive messenger, business mentor, and visionary entrepreneur building an empire, living in Chicago, IL with my husband and daughter. Here you’ll find everything you need to know about creating success from your soul and truly living free Read More

Ariel Frey

Success Coach, writer, and all about making a global impact. In 1.5 years I went from working as a server to creating a quarter of a million dollar business.

Now I'm dedicated to helping driven female entrepreneurs like you make more money, have more freedom, and breakthrough to the next level to live your most extraordinary life.

Your gifts are meant to be in the world in a big way!

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